Life and times of an astrophysist who is actually a former journalism student who is really a NERD nerdy retarded weird girl pretending to be an astrophysisist...mispelling INTENDED!

NERD nerdy retarded weird girl central...well mostly my mussings and random interludes whilst I am working towards getting a car and licence so my random adventures and time spent in Australia was worth while. It should be intersting Enjoy! While in Australia...I was sunburnt,went to Sydney and wrote my first novel. So far back in Canadia I have been couch hoping and meandering from city to city. More adventures to come. Hopefully they are as interesting as my Australia ones.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Welsh? Never heard of that? Where the heck is Welsh anyways?

Today I shall present an actual conversation Kayla and I had. Simply because she says the funniest things with out even realizing it.

Conversation 1:

We were watching the TV show House Wednesday night when this question was brought up.

Kayla: Does Hugh Laurie sound British to you?
Me: Actually he is Welsh
Kayla: Welsh? Never heard of that? Where the heck is Welsh anyways?
Me: Its Wales
Kayla: Umm What? Whales? Where’s that?
Me: Umm… near England, people from Wales are called Welsh.
Kayla: There is no such place
Me: Right that’s why Princess Diana was referred to as the Princess of Wales.
Kayla: Oooohhhhh!

Conversation 2:

On Thursday morning, we were discussing why I haven’t celebrated a birthday since I was 19 with my family. Yeah it’s sad. Suffice to say the last two birthdays have sucked. Anyways enough about that….

Kayla: So why haven’t you been with your family for all those birthdays?
Me: My mom and I lived in different provinces B.C. and Alberta, while I went to college
Kayla: What? How is that possible?
Me: What do you mean?
Kayla: How can your mom live in B.C?
Me: Umm… it’s a province
Kayla: Yeah but B.C stands for Before Christ
Me: I was referring to British Columbia most Canadians refer to it as B.C.
Kayla: That’s kind of stupid
Me: No it isn’t.
Kayla: What are provinces again?
Me: There like states basically
Kayla: Oh OK.

And now for some reason I want to go to Wales.

Speaking of Kayla, she seemed kind of pissed that I told her that I didn’t want to go to her party because I have an assignment worth 60% in week 12. She told me I was strange and made the point that she has 50% assignment in week 9 and she won’t have any weekends. What? Does she prefer the real answer I was going to give her:

Real Answer: Oh Kayla, I would rather eat my non existent carpet, then spend five minutes in the fiery pits of hell, throw up all the carpet and run around the street naked then go to your stupid party.

Proper polite Answer: I’m sorry I pay a lot of money to be here and I could be deported or put under academic surveillance if I fail because I worry too much and I really don’t want to do four essays at once in one week.

End Result: I went to Kayla’s party with disastrous results that I really don’t want to write about.

I wonder if Kayla knows that I just ‘payed’ her out in this blog for being unintentionally dumb. I will now put the first conversation into Carol story format, over exaggerated of course.

Melissa’s Flat: Melissa, Kayla and Carol are watching the TV show House, when the question of the actors who plays House is brought up.

Kayla: Does Hugh Laurie sound British to you?
Melissa: Actually he is Welsh
Carol: Noooo he sounds American can’t you hear the American accent Melissa or have the Aussie accents rotted your brain?
Kayla: Welsh? Never heard of that? Where the heck is the Welsh anyways?
Melissa: Its Wales and my brain hasn’t rotted Carol.
Carol: Noooo Melissa they don’t name countries after mammals or aquatic life that’s just stupid and you are a NERD NERDY RETARDED GIRL.
Kayla: Umm What? Whales? Where’s that? By the way I am always right.
Melissa: Umm… near England people from Wales are called Welsh.
Carol: How do you know this Melissa? Stop being such a fat brain NERD.
Melissa hands Carol a travel guide about Great Britain and shows her the section about Wales.
Carol: Ohhhh Wales, who wrote this book and why do they insist that I am wrong.
Kayla: There is no such place, I have never heard of it therefore it does not exist.
Carol: Yes there it does. It’s written in this book. (She shoves the book into Kayla’s lap). See Kayla!
Me: Right that’s why Princess Diana was referred to as the Princess of Wales.
Kayla: Oooohhhhh!
Carol: Oh yeah now I remember this Wales, geeze Melissa you didn’t have to go all NERDY and shove a NERD travelling book in my face.

And now to the subject about nerds, is it me or do they typically have a bad stigma attached to being one?

Seeing as I am talking about nerds, my tutor for Introduction to Communication and Culture is going to think I am a science fiction nerd because I managed to bring it up in half of my weekly exercises. My final essay is about Futurama which is science fiction and my weekly exercise I brought up Back To The Future movie. She may also see me as Canadian centric as the other half of my assignments brought up Canada and I seem to relate the whole stupid class back to Canada. So there you have it I am a Canadian centric science fiction NERD. I found this interesting book in the library about how women were portrayed in science fiction films from the 1950s which I will include in my essay. Blame the science fiction nerdom on my mom, I grew up watching the stuff. Curse you Hev! And only Chris will know what I mean about that.

The name Fergus, do you find it funny? Chris does. Every time I say it Chris laughs. Perhaps it’s the funny looking dog that lives at the flat manager’s residence, whose name is Fergus. Fergus is such a hit with Chris he suggested that I bring him in to my Wild Will stories through an intricate plot about eight parallel characters, such as a beaver named Captain Winky and Carol. I am thinking I could bring the character Frostbite and Kate in to the story, by having them be angry because they don’t alternate characters. I also have an alternate character named Alyssa who claims to be the illustrator and likes the same guy as me. It’s not written yet, but I am sure it will be as bizarre as the other ones.


Amy said...

Melissa! I miss you and your humour so much! This entry made me laugh until tears were coming down my face! I can just imagine all the fun i would have had with Kayla and you, having stupid conversations! And Chris! And Antonia! I miss you all so much! When's your birthday again? I don't think you ever told me. Don't worry, my birthday is going to suck this year as well, but i don't mind, it's just a birthday. Guess what? I'm going to start bollywood dancing classes on Wednesday! I'm going to look like an idiot but i'll impress Yogi when i get back :) Hahah, just kidding!
Luv AMy

Chris The Beatnik said...

( * ) ( * )

Heehee, if I read the YOU-KNOW-WHICH name one more time my intestines just might throttle me. :-)