Life and times of an astrophysist who is actually a former journalism student who is really a NERD nerdy retarded weird girl pretending to be an astrophysisist...mispelling INTENDED!

NERD nerdy retarded weird girl central...well mostly my mussings and random interludes whilst I am working towards getting a car and licence so my random adventures and time spent in Australia was worth while. It should be intersting Enjoy! While in Australia...I was sunburnt,went to Sydney and wrote my first novel. So far back in Canadia I have been couch hoping and meandering from city to city. More adventures to come. Hopefully they are as interesting as my Australia ones.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Flaunt it if you got it, but if you don't want to thats OK Too!

It’s hard to believe November is over. Its almost been 10 months since I’ve been in Australia.

I know I’m bored when…on Wednesday I made a sign that says “GO AWAY I HATE YOU!” on my bedroom door just to see how the other flatmates would respond. Kumar thought it was directed at him and Kristine wondered why it was even on my door.

I should also point out that Kumar and I are getting along much better now.

I spent the last couple of days writing my story. It’s coming along good. I have written 11 chapters now. Its probably one of the first real stories I have actually written. I have a new idea in the works. As always you can read the story here. Or perhaps one day I might divuldge a preview.

And I am easily amused for the following reasons.

- I think its cool I can call my mom and its still November and its December here. I can’t wait till Jan 1. I can call and it will be the year 2007 but it will still be 2006 in Canada.
- Kumar has a girl bike
-A Boy Named Sue…that’s got to be the funniest song I’ve heard.
- My mom likes Minties too :)
-The humidity makes my hair really curly.

Today I went shopping with Joan and Justin. It was alright. Joan had me try on like 11 different swimsuits. I feel bad because I didn’t like any of them. She seems to think it’s important to show cleavage and it just isn’t me. I know I know flaunt it if you got it, but I don’t want guys looking at me for the wrong reasons.

Justin and Joan bickered for a good part of the shopping experience. My friend Carol once said its awkward when couples show affection in public, but I say it’s more awkward when they fight. Perhaps I should have been “brutally blunt” and told them I felt this way, but I am sure I showed it when I magically phased out for about 15 minutes. On a good note I did buy some Christmas cards and a new chain for my locket.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Another Love Hate Relationship

Take note the previous entry was actually directed a more than one person.

One of which is my new flatmate Kumar. It’s because of this it has come to my attention that I have developed another love/hate relationship. For some reason he just irritates the hell out of me. We clash horribly. Kristine says it’s probably normal that the flat was mine before he moved in and he is in my territory. Interesting thought, but how come I liked her straight away. I have only ever clashed with one flatmate besides him. Don’t get me wrong he is nice guy and I am sure he means well but it’s just the odd quick that gets in the way.

And take note I have said all that I am about to whinge about to this his face. Previous lessons learnt from a previous experience.

So far I have:

-Managed to be uninvited to from eating curry or any Indian food permanently. I didn’t understand that when you share with people in India everyone is automatically invited. If I known I might not have had dinner previously and decided to love lamb liver.

-Angered him because I have a bad habit concerning the dishes. This one annoys all flatmates I have had; except for Kristine she seems pretty slack about them too.

- Learnt to put the toilet seat down on a permanent basis. I feel like taping it down just to see how he likes it. It’s pretty much expected in western culture that when I guy uses the toilet seat and there are girls living in the same area. The toilet seat should be left down.

- Learnt the air conditioner although it is there for our use is apparently not allowed to be used because it costs money. Even though there is no way of telling who is using it its still bad and were all supposed to endure the heat. It’s not my fault certain housemates particularly Kristine use the air-con on at night.

-Had my Brita jug contaminated by spit because he is too lazy to use a glass.

- I am apparently to spendthrift, eat unhealthy, sleep to much. And I should be paid to write worthwhile not write stuff that has no meaning. As if he as even read anything I have written.

-Offended him on certain the issues, particularly homosexuality. It’s not my fault he’s homophobic! Although, I probably shouldn’t have said to him: “For someone who is so against homosexuality you seem pretty interested in Chris’s boyfriend.” Maybe because when ever he came into my room he would always ask about Jeremy. Not to mention make many unecessary homophobic comments. I also understand that homosexuality is a controversial subject. But it hurts when people say mean things about your friends.

To all this I say:


Saturday, November 25, 2006

My half attempt at a contradictory apology

I have learnt the important lesson to be careful of what you write in a blog.

Apparently I offended someone very deeply and wrote some things that are particularly mean and hurtful. And because I don’t want to make matters worse, I am not going to say who this person is.

This may sound contradictory but here is my thoughts on the matter.

1. I apologize for offending anyone I know.
2. But I don’t apologize for what I wrote or said because I meant it at the time and I still do. I am sick of apologizing for how I feel.
3. The previous two statements contradict each other.
4. Also if I ever implied that you were cracking on to me….YOU WISH! I backtracked my blog and no where did I find a hint of this. I was most likely writing about someone else.
5. The above statement just contradicted the previous two statements again.
6. On second thought I apologize for nothing. Bite My Shinny Metal Ass!
7. I can “grow a back bone!” The person who said this particular phrase to me should grow a brain and leave me alone like I told them too in the first place but I guess that’s not going to happen.
8. How can you expect me to be nice to you when you say mean things about my friends?
9. You’re full of yourself. Look in the mirror you’re not all that and a box of Smarties.
10. Next time I see this person I’m plan on telling all this to his face.

This question is irritating me lately: “Are you going home for Christmas?” I am finding it really hard this month it being so close to Christmas and my family being so far away. It’s because of this question I think I snapped at a customer at work the other day.

Customer: That’s an interesting accent where are you from?
Me: Canada.
Customer: Oh cool are going home for Christmas?
Long awkward silence.
Me: You know that question is really depressing me lately
Customer: I know what you mean…
Me: Doubt it
Customer: Actually I do
Me: Actually you don’t.
Customer: Excuse me?
Me: Well it feels that way. My family is a million miles away and I can’t afford to go home.
Customer: Oh I’m sorry that must be hard.
Me: Obviously

This just proves that I am either:
A: Homesick,
B: A Bitch,
C: Both A and B,
D: Pathetic and sarcastic
E: All of the above

I am betting on the last one.

However from talking to people I found out that I’m not the only one with out their family for Christmas and for those of you who are I sympathize with you.

You know what I just realized. I have a really strange writer quirk. I switch from past to present tense a lot. Well I already realized that. What I just thought of is. My Wild Will stories they switch from past to present. I was going to fix them but then I thought that’s what makes the stories unique. It’s now become an essential element to the stories, along with the inside jokes and strange occurrences, among other things. I am also sad to say the Wild Will story I am writing now will be my last. On a good note I found away to incorporate the Wild Will characters into another story I am writing.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


Holly smokes on Sunday it will have been nine months since I came to Australia. NINE MONTHS! I honestly never thought I would make it this long. I find it odd that I am now up to nine flatmates. It’s as if I had a flatmate for every month that I have been here.

I finished another chapter of my superheroes story. You can read it here.

Strange words I have learnt from Chris and Kate:

Fallopian pie

Annoying nickname that keep getting called lately: “Tits McKenna”

I’m going to say it here because I know my friends read this blog. I seriously don’t like being called that.

Things I’ve noticed lately:

Chris and Kate still accuse me of killing characters in movies still. And now apparently so does Amy.

And for some reason every time I’ve seen Joan she keeps referring to herself in the third person. It’s quite interesting if you think about it.

I know my friends are having an influence on me. So much in fact I spoke to my Korean co-work Cho as if they were Chris or Kate. It happened like this on Friday. I was filling up the sour cream when I spilt it all over the place. I accidentally cursed. I didn’t think anyone had heard me, but apparently that wasn’t the case. Cho heard me.

Cho: You shouldn’t says bad words
Me: Shut up! I never said a bad word
Cho: Yes you say bad words
Me: Shut up! No I didn’t!
Cho: Shut up is bad words.
Me: Shut up you’re a bad word!
Cho: (gives me a funny look.) You said bad words.

Alright the phrase shut up isn’t exactly a nice thing to say. It’s more rude than bad and it’s true I shouldn’t say bad words.

This is completely unrelated but Cho annoys me. He steals jobs that the manager asks me to do and he sneaks behind me for no apparent reason. When I turn around he is just there. It’s seriously creepy.

Another random observation about work would be: When the manager Joe and Cho speak to each other in Korean. I always wonder what they are talking about.

On Thursday octogenarian pregnant old lady men were fighting over plastic shopping bags at the bus stop. Apparently one of the men’s bags broke or it was blown away in the wind. He promptly blamed it on the guy sitting beside him. There was almost a physical confrontation. They started yelling at each other and calling each other bastards. It was the stupidest thing. Surprisingly the others waiting for the bus paid no attention to this altercation. I silently observed this while a lady with 80s style hair with bad smelling perfume sat beside me. However, once my bus came the two oldies managed to put the quarrel behind them. One of them remarked how he gets angrily easy. You think?

Monday, November 13, 2006

I am writing in a writer writer wonder land!

I received good marks for my second term. They are as follows.

Introduction to Communication – HD

Cultural and Media Identity – D

Mass Media and Journalism – D

Reporting the Asia Pacific – D

For those of you who do not know:

HD means High Distinction
D means Distinction

Today I feel a sense of accomplishment. I have finished eight chapters in total of my new story that I am writing. You can read it here if you want. I think I like this story better than most of the stories have written lately.

Of course I haven’t forgotten about Wild Will. I am still writing the one about Kate. And no Kate you can’t see it until it’s finished. No one else got to see their story before it was done. *Sticks out tongue*

Nothing of importance happened on Monday. Except I slept in and mine and Amy’s Indian friend Kumar is to become my new flatmate. I have no idea when he is moving in. I think its some sort of weird coincidence. That would make him flatmate number nine.

Chris says I seem to get the weird people. For example, the movie collector, the chronic complainer, the scary drunk, and the one who speaks in a muffled garble.

On Saturday I went out clubbing with Chris and Kate. It was alright, but there was one problem. I forgot my passport and the ID I had wasn’t sufficient enough. So we had to go all the way back to my place to get it. Other than that it was alright. Although, I felt slightly self conscious, I am not really into the clubbing scene. I would rather stay home and write.

I felt like I was having bad luck. So Chris and Kate blamed me for four things that went wrong on Saturday and Sunday. I assume they were joking of course

1. Losing my passport
2. Wedging Kate’s car door into the grassy lawn, which cause her to have to dig up Chris’s lawn with garden shovel.
3. Making characters die on movies specifically by way of heart attacks and characters have near death experience.
4. Encouraging the characters make sweet sweet love.

On Friday I finally got my mom a didgeridoo. I also bought my mom and brother a boomerang, some Fantails and Minties. I have also included a Christmas card with Koala’s on it. I finally succeed in getting my family a cool present.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

“What’s a nice Canadian girl like you doing here in this hot weather?”

First off my brother turned 15 yestoday so:

Happy Birthday Tony!

Yesterday was a good day for the following reasons:

I received my Introduction of Communication and Culture assignment, in which I got a really good mark.

I finally figured out what to get my mom and brother for Christmas. A didgeridoo! And all I had to do was ask. You see I rang up my brother to wish him a happy birthday when I had this odd conversation with my mom:

Hey Mom I’ve been trying to find you a present for Christmas that is uniquely Australian.
Mom: Oh really what about that instrument that is only found in Australia.
Me: Instrument?
Mom: You know the one that makes the funny sound. (Imitates sound, really well I might add)
Me: Ooooh a didgeridoo?
Mom: (Sounds excited about the prospect of possibly getting a didgeridoo)Yes that’s it. That would be really neat Melissa.
Me: Brilliant! I have been struggling to think of a something Australian to give you and Tony that isn’t one of those tacky collectables. So you want one? I am sure I can find a cheep one at one of those touristy places.
Mom: Are you saying I’m cheap? (She’s joking by the way.)
Me: Well no it’s just that an authentic one might be pricey. I’ll see what I can do.
Mom: I understand but it would be cool all the same.

Things I have been thinking about lately: (in no particular order)

My nationality keeps coming everyday. It’s weird because I have become accustomed to the “what part of America are you from?” question. However a guy I met on the way to the bus today. He picked up instantly that I was Canadian. He said he can tell the difference. He says that the American accent is more brash and loud, while the Canadian accent although similar is quieter and friendlier. I am starting to feel bad for Americans for some reason. Maybe it’s because no one likes them. How can people judge 300 million people on the stereotype that all they are obnoxious and think they own the world?

The climate or weather in Canada comes second. People always figure its cold. Canada has SUMMER! Nice warm summers depending where you live. Yes there is winter but its different depending where you live. The Prairies have cold winters; Central and Atlantic Canada have cold and wet winters. Vancouver, has nice mild winters.

And now for some cultural differences, or as it sounds from reading this really random ranting:

The proper name for Eskimos is Inuit.

Ice hockey is not a bloody violent sport it’s the awesomest game ever and its Canada’s national pastime not national sport. How come I never here how violent and bloody rugby is over here. *shakes fist in anger*

Canada has a foot ball league called the CFL and the players who wear all the padding and stuff are not pansies or wimps.

Another example of my nationality as a topic of discussion happened today.

Customer: What’s a nice Canadian girl like you doing here in this hot weather?
Me: I’m going to uni.
Customer: Oh I figured.
Me: It’s going to be the opposite in Canada.
Customer: I know I bet its getting really cold. (laughs)

You bet? Don’t laugh buddy my family is about to endure cold. Grrrrr…..wait never mind.

Hungry Jack’s commercials only have stereotypical masculine guys in them. Obviously the target audience or person they think comes to their restaurants is blokey blokes but I have seen girls come to eat at the restaurant. This one is strange to me for some reason. It’s been irritating me for weeks. Perhaps it’s proof that I think to much or that those communication classes I took at uni taught me to look stuff differently.

I have always heard the expressions “the American way or “the Australian way”, but for some reason when I hear the terms “the Canadian way” it sounds awkward. In fact if I put any other nationality in between the and way it sounds bizarre. Also I always here the some what negative expressions, “un-American” or “un-Australian”, but again I never hear the term un-Canadian. To me it suggests those expressions mean conformity. This concept has really confounded me lately and I have no idea why. Maybe it’s the letter A. I am really interested in what others think of this too.

Grizzly bears in Canada are like crocodiles in Australia. Each country knows how to stay safe around them, and tourists always seem to be the ones attacked by them.

I want to go to New Zealand, Malaysia, Japan and Brazil. So much in fact I keep dreaming that I go there and actually, I want to go to a lot of places.

Saturday, November 04, 2006


Tis been a long absence….

But there hasn’t been anything to write about really.


Everyday I went to work my nationality, was yet again brought up. However, I am getting better at making sushi and according to Step a staff member, my behaviour is funny, in a good way of course.

I started a completely new story and it’s not about Wild Will. It’s starting off OK, only it really weird. It’s a parody of superhero type stories. Each of the characters is based on my friends. So far it’s in story format but I thinking of trying it in script format. This isn’t to say that this story couldn’t exist in the Wild Will reference. Consequently I started another Wild Will story about Kate…she wears a pink tutu and has a shoe named George. The idea is Kate is mad because the writer hasn’t included in any previous stories, except for one, which she feels is by default.

Lately I really miss home. I feel like everyone back in Canada has forgotten about me. Perhaps I should e-mail them

Random things that have happened:

I bought new CDs

Joan met my flatmate Kristine.


I’m addicted to Minties.

The end!