Melissa Computer?

I want to write something positive for once!

After a whirlwind trip to Vancouver, where my little brother was subjected to 3 doctors appointments in 1 day in a span of just hours, evil taxi drivers, my computer becoming a babysitter/ calmness enabler (more on that later) and I surviving the antics of Hev-Lady; It appears Tony (my brother)most likely won’t need surgery due to his scoliosis as the doctor believes he has stopped growing and therefore if no more growing takes place he’d be able to function with the spine he has (which is just as twisty and scary as my mind.:P )This is something I am thankful for because it apparently is a very painful procedure and my brother has a enough issues without having to recover from major surgery. Phew!

As for my computer, the battery was practically drained both trips on the plane…

Was subjected to certain spills

Was used to keep my brother occupied

A reason for a 6:30 am wake up call…

My brother is obsessed with my computer.

Me: (Arriving at car which will take us to the Vancouver trip of all tiredness.) Hi Tony!

Tony: AHAAHDFHSDFHLSDKFHKJDSHFJKSHD! MELISSA!

Chauffer person (Mom had someone help us get to and fromJ): (Wincing) Oh oh ummm….Tony?

Mom: (she is used to this therefore it is of no consequence Tony:) Yes Tony it’s your sister

Me: Yay its Tony!

Tony: MELISSA! MELISSA COMPUTER! MELISSA DOLLIES! Melissa Computer?

Me: Maybe later.

Tony: Whoooo oooohhhh

Later On:

Me: So Tony who would you like to sit with on the plane? Mom or Me?

Ummmm Melissa computer?

Me: You want to sit with my computer?

Tony: Yah!

Mom: (Laughs)

Even later on after we went through security and Tony checked to make sure my computer was alright.

Tony: (Super stoked about going on the plane, makes a mad dash for the metal bird and as he ascends the stairs he asks the flight attendant…) Melissa computer allowed? Play Melissa computer?

Flight attendant (Her name is Melanie by the way and like most people has no clue what Tony is on about.)

Me: He wants to know if my computer is allowed on and if he can play my computer on the plane?

Melanie: Yes just as soon we are in the air and the Captain has taken off the fasten seatbelt sign.

Tony: Whoooooo MELISSA COMPUTER!

Melanie: (directs us to our seats, I sit by Tony. I have the computer after all.)

Tony: (Every 2 seconds) Melissa computer?

Me: Yes just as soon as the seatbelt light is off (I point the seatbelt sign to him)

Meanwhile the airplane rises into the air of altitudes of 23,000 ft. I know I shouldn’t be scared of flying after going overseas and all but….ummm yes

Tony: (Watching plane lift off with mad interest)

10 seconds later…Light blinks out.

Tony: Melissa Computer?

Me: Yes Tony.

This happened pretty much the exact same way on the flight home, except the flight attendant on the way home was named Meadow and she was a blonde not a brunette. Anyways thanks to Tony, when I got home I swear I had Spiderman and/or Harry Potter engraved in my eyeballs.

P.S. My brother is my hero!

The Scope of it.

Me: Hello? (now what does she want?)
Mom: (frantically) I think you took the wrong scope.
Me: What the?
Mom: You took the wrong scope?
Me: I have no idea what you’re talking about?
Mom: You know the mouthwash.
Me: You mean the Listerine? (oh right I did take her full bottle of mouthwash by accident….yes that it an accident, she was using mine anyway.)
Mom: I had a full bottle and you had less then half of the Scope left.
Me: You mean the Listerine?
Mom: Whatever!
Me: I guess I did?
Mom: Yeah well anyways…what you doing?
Me: It’s Listerine not Scope!
Mom: Scope, mouthwash, Listerine, whatever! I’m not in the mood to be corrected. Melissa. It doesn’t matter what it’s called you knew what I was talking about.
Me: Actually I didn’t (although I did have an idea after about the second time she told me.)
Mom: Oh? Something, something, something…
Me: I am on my way to work.
Mom: I thought so…
Me: I have to go. I’m almost there!
Mom: OK. I just wanted to let you know about the mouthwash.
Me: OK….bye!

The issue of the mouthwash hasn’t been properly resolved yet. I guess she wants me to buy her a new bottle? Great something else I owe her.

I have some pretty long conversations with my mom. She never calls about anything specifically she just wants to talk. You know that point in the conversation where you’re not really even listening to the person anymore and you start to phase out and maybe plan how to exit the conversation politely? I do that a lot, but it doesn’t make it any less awkward. It’s not like I can just hang up on her. I’ve purposely antagonized her just so she will hang up, which is also morally corrupt. I mean I can but it is my mother after all. It’s kind of like “yep, yes, uh huh, oh sorry I have to ummm get ready to go now, I have to go to umm work or I just woke up I’m not ready for conversation yet,” especially when Hev-Lady wants to talk about her every day activities. For instance gardening, the dogs, and her personal issues; I really feel like a councilor some days, perhaps I should start charging her. She certainly spends enough sending me 4+ texts a day and a voicemail.

Since yesterday I have been struggling with the stories I am working on. I can’t seem to get a plot together for Fizzy Lemonade. It’s coming together. But I think I am slightly obsessed to the point I sit there with my notebook at the kitchen table and write out a bunch of nonsensical scribbling about how I can work it out. I have no one to bounce story ideas off of anymore it seems. I get the “this actually goes on in your head look?” I had one friend say I have a very twisty mind and she’d love to see inside it. I wouldn’t recommend it unless she wants to meander around in a sometimes dark, scatterbrained, random place. They’d either come out highly amused or scarred for life.

P.S. Today has been one of those lazy days…