Cats are not microwaveable

Alrighty so I should be out looking for a job, but the fact of the matter is I am lazy. That’s right I am lazy. I am so lazy I want the job to come looking for me instead of me looking for the job. I am also obsessed with Donkey Kong Country. However, I beat the entire game. THE ENTIRE GAME! I was stuck on this stupid winter level for three days or more, but finally I just gave it a lot of concentration and I finished it.


I am still trying to write but I think because of my lack of productivity I am unable to think of anything to write or write down. This is just another reason to find a job. They always say full house empty mind.

I recently found out from my mom, that my brother Tony tried to microwave an entire cat. AN ENTIRE CAT!? Apparently yesterday Tony put his pet kitten Picaso in the microwave and turned it on. Luckily my mom stopped him. The cat was scared and heated up (quite literally) but she is OK now. My said after she gave him a talking too and explained what he did was wrong, to which he responded with a heartfelt cry. So hopefully he understood. I reckon they should have warning labels on small animals just like other non microwavable containers.

This inspires a Philis story.

Ashleigh: My brother Zach put his pet cat in the microwave!
Philis: What! That’s terrible!
Ashleigh: Clearly….
Philis: Why would your brother microwave a cat he’s not from that Chinese restaurant is he?
Ashleigh: Philis you know that using cats in place of chickens is just an unverifiable rumour.
Philis: Where does Antonia get all her chicken and stuff Chinese food then?
Ashleigh: Antonia runs a French restaurant.
Philis: I heard she uses mermaids….and the Bamboozle Chronicle Herald staff knooooow about it but they won’t say anything because Antonia let them use her basement as a newsroom while their other newsroom was getting fixed.
Ashleigh: Yeah sadly that is true.
Philis: What! That’s terrible! First your brother murders cats and then Antonia uses mermaids for fish type foods. It’s an insult to my fat when I pay for chicken I want chicken, damn it. When I pay for fish and chips I want the flipping fish!
Ashleigh: If you had let me finish the story about my brother. I would have told you my mom caught him in time and the cat is OK.
Philis: Hev-Lady?
Ashleigh: It’s HEVLYNN!
Philis: It’s all the same to me…case in point dolphins and whales didn’t have legs.
Ashleigh: What ever fat ass!

In breaking news my mom found out my true intentions for staying here in Australia and she was kind of none too pleased due to the financial side of my decision and confused on why I chose to do so, but after careful discussion I explained it too her and she understood. I hope. She said other sad things besides the cat too but I don’t want to discuss it here because it is very sad.

P.S. I am wearing my pink shirt!!

Promoting procastination, examination and boredom

Oh no: I wasn't saying it was bad being obsessive, I was just saying I am not sure about Mr Oct. and the type of man he might be. I would love to be proven wrong, but at the same time, not at the expense of my best friend, if I am proven right. At the same time: nothing tried is nothing gained. So do what you think is best Melissa!

Joan has a good point! Now I can finally quench my morbid curiosity. I wasn’t angry with her either just curious. Sometimes I feel like Joan is the wise older sister and I am the younger naive one but it’s weird because I am 23 and she is 19. Oh wells its good to know there is always someone out there looking out for you.

Anyways….

Now that university is over for about 4 months because I finally did my exam for Events, Leisure and Entertainment. It actually seemed easier than I though it would be. I noticed another classmate in tears because of the exam and I thought I had anxiety.

So do to relentless boredom I made a Fergus Poster! I dedicate it to the most beautiful woman in the world Mrs. Lachlan’s Mum.



So what else have I been up too lately?

I also find myself playing Donkey Kong Country continually on my computer or pondering about my next novel. That reminds me I dreamt that I’d be playing Donkey Kong and being super excited about it. Then next thing I know about a couple of weeks later I somehow came across the ability to do so. How strange is that? So now I am obsessed with Donkey Kong Country. It has to be my favourite of all time.

I really want to write the second story about the superheroes characters but I keep having dreams about my other story that I am sort of writing. I have had no inspiration for the others, perhaps the characters of my science fiction story are getting sick of being put on the back burner and want there story to be told? However, it’s lame as, two of the stupid main characters won’t stop pining for each other and there’s an entire telepathic super-intelligent cat, who I suspect has PMS. AN ENTIRE CAT! Where do I come up with this stuff?

I bought a pink shirt. PINK! I must be changing because a year ago I would never consider buying something pink much less wearing it and liking it. I love my new pink shirt. It looked like a Melissa shirt the very moment I tried it on.

I also have a job interview for Pixi Foto to do promotions on Wednesday. If I get the job I’ll be one of those annoying people who bug shoppers in Target about getting profession portraits done. I feel sad for those customers already. I do hope I get the job though.

P.S. I am obsessed with this blog!

Pinball and obsession

I have this real desire to play pinball lately. I want to play the real pin ball machine at Strutters Night Club for some reason. I am obsessed in that I am using the names of my characters on the high score list. Hmmmm….I guess its my form of procrastination.

I thought this article was really smart. I give it ten nerds out of ten. Basically some scientists have figured out a way to use human waste as in faecal waste to use as fuel and fertiliser, which will help with the problem of global warming.

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/afp/071017/health/india_environment_health_toilet_waste_warming

So I was having one of those good dreams that you don’t want to wake up from. I can’t remember what it was about but I know that it was pleasant because I was very disappointed when I was woken up by my new flatmate Jenny from South Korea banging cupboard doors for some weird reason. Jenny is nice but she is quite noisy in the morning, she has this thing for closing the bathroom door when she is finished, has went through 3 rolls of my toilet paper in two days and she runs the tap while she is doing her business. It’s probably because she is afraid I’ll hear her which I wouldn’t anyways. Joan says I should mention Australia is going through something called a drought. And my other friend Serena says I should tell her that it’s not really necessary to close the door because Aussies are more relaxed about bathroom type activities Hmmm….. Now how to tell her so that I don’t sound like a grouch and she will understand?

She has also got to be the most reclusive flatmate I have ever had. My theory is she has culture shock because she doesn’t know much English. I know what culture shock is all about my first two weeks in Australia. I hibernated in my room because I was afraid to come out. Jenny came around yesterday and we had a bit of chat but it was really interesting how she’d repeat the words I say and kind of shake her head to show she didn’t quite understand. So I would think of a simpler word to say what it mean and she got it. For instance I was trying to say what Joan was like. I said she was loud and bubbly. She didn’t get bubbly so I had to use the word happy instead. She doesn’t seem to like my other new flatmate Dave. He reckons it’s because of his tattoos. He isn’t a scary bloke either, but I think it’s because I am less threatening because I am a female. Good old social conditioning!! You never fail do you?

I am starting the sequel to Song of the Superheroes or more appropriately the next in the series I see five books for some reason. I have three titles choose from the original title Fizzy Lemonade or Kate’s suggestion No Dogs Allowed or my new one No Ogs Low from Chapter 32 where the toddler chewed up the no dogs allowed sign. You see I was discussing it with Kate and Chris and well the dogs get tired of discrimination and form the dog army. I also have a whole bunch of new characters to introduce too. I can't wait to finish this one.

This is really bugging me and I don't know why. I don't think a friend of mine likes Officer Octogenarian too much. I said something about him last night and she was none to nice in what she thought. I think my liking him boarder lines on an obsessive infatuation. You know when you can see no wrong in them. Matters of the heart must truly be blind I supposed. She seems to think he is a bad guy. No else sees a problem with me liking him. Why does she? It’s just morbid curiosity really. So I implore you Joan. Why don’t you like my Officer Octogenarian?

P.S. I have obsession issues. OBSESSION ISSUES! Its entirely annoying me.

I love Australia this much!

Well it appears I am black to Plan C. In order to stay longer in Australia I had credit rearranged. I had three random credits for unspecified courses given to me at the beginning of last year, but I took two of those back and now I will be studying next year Term 1 2008. So I will qualify for the two year study rule to be able to apply for permanent residency because I have to be in Australia over 2 years and have taken at least 16 subjects. Before this I only had 14 courses and immigration said I didn’t qualify. I guess most uni friends I know would say you could have finished this year and been done with uni forever, why on earth would you make is so you could stay another term!? I’ve lost my entire mind that’s why! Or as I demonstrated to friends I with out reached hands proclaimed “I love Australia this much.”

It’s true I get homesick when I am down and it might be tough again another Christmas away from Canada, but I am sure yesteryear was a just a testing run to see how I could do it. I made it and it wasn’t that bad. In fact I wrote Chapter 25 of superheroes on December 25, that was the highlight of my entire Christmas Day. Poor Hev-Lady (Mom) and General Question Mark (Brother) are going to be sad I’m not home for Christmas.

On Thursday I made an entire appointment with Student Services in which I figured out how to stay longer. Anyways the conversation with the International Support Officer and the Admissions Officer kind of went like this…

Me: Well I really want to stay in Australia because I have a lot of good friends here.
ISO: (oh so coyly) Would one of these friends happen to be a boy?
Me: (Accidentally blushes…) Noooooooo of course not.
AO: Oh sure looks she’s blushing, she’s blushing.
Me thinking: Perhaps a boy is on my mind? Nah that’s stupid it can’t be that boy.
ISO: Sure….
Me: Well maybe a fraction of it? But mostly because of friends.
AO: Sure your turning red.
Me: I turn red easily. (Awkward silence)
ISO: You look nice in brown.
I just happened to be wearing a lot of brown on Thursday.
Me: Oh thank you my friend Amy says brown is my colour.
ISO: Oh look were all wearing brown today. It’s a brown day.
Me: Yes….
ISO: I have brown sandals and she (points to Admissions Officer) is wearing a brown too.
Me: Well I like red…?
ISO: Don’t wear red or that boy you like will run away from you.
Me: Oh well I don’t wear red I just like it. I am no scarlet woman.
ISO & AO: Laughs.

Right so I guess my grandparents are not the only ones to assume my wanting to stay in Australia is because of romance. Officer Octogenarian most likely doesn’t even know I exist. EXIST! Why would I go through all this trouble just to stay for him? Would I stay for a friends engagement party? Yes, yes and yes! To hang out with long lost friends from Sydney and Canberra in December? Heck Yes! Staying because of some boy I like? Most likely not?

A lot of my friends back in Canada are sad that I am not coming back. I don’t have the heart to tell some of them that I am planning on staying forever. FOREVER! Although, I do plan to come back and visit.

P.S. My grandma wants to know how I missed out on two courses….

Plans A to D Which plan will work for me!....SUPERHEROES IS FINISHED!!!

I’ve had an amazingly spectacular week….Just when I thought things were kind of going down hill, things seemed to get better. For starters I got invited to join The International Golden Key Honour Society, because I am in the top 15 per cent, I was able to finish assignments and my computer is now fixed! Yay! Snaps for my friend who fixed it for me.

GOOD NEWS!

Song of the Superheroes is finished. FINISHED!

I wrote the last chapter today Chapter 59! It ends weird but again it started out weird too. There is even an epilogue. The finished product is now 131,591 words. I had sudden creative energy one uni was finished on Saturday and Sunday I wrote both Chapter 57 and Chapter 58. Since then I have written 8, 470 words. I can’t believe it’s finished. It feels so weird. Now all I have to do is go over it again and begin draft two. I’ll let you know of any particular changes.

My next project is the second in my series called Fizzy Lemonade with the same characters but a different story altogether. It will still touch on the same themes that Song of the Superheroes did. The power of the media and such…It will have a new hero though.

It seems like all good things are coming to an end. Uni, my Australian adventure, and now my entire novel, but I don’t necessarily see it as a bad thing, but merely a transition to my next adventure, which hopefully sees me staying in Australia, but if I go home that’s OK too.

You see I’ve been thinking about visas. Yes I have considered it very seriously like and I have four options to think about.

Plan A: Go back home, my grandparents did offer to help.
Plan B: Go back home visit my family and save up and come back on a Working Holiday Visa or for a Permanent Residency visa, most likely that later.
Plan C: Figure out a way to stay longer by applying for another bachelors degree or applying for a new student visa so I can study post graduate studies, yes I need a new visa to study post grad.
Plan D: Find an employer to sponsor me on a working visa so I can stay.

So far I like Plan B: and Plan D: the best. Plan C is tempting but it’s expensive to study in Australia and I do like uni, but I think I should take a few years break from it. Plan A just makes me sad, so if I can’t figure out how to go with Plan D I’ll go with Plan B: I hope this makes sense. So far I asked the local meatworks if they sponsored workers from overseas. They got mad at me and said no. I am going to try the Morning Bulletin next. I just hope I am back her in December so when Amy comes back from Canberra we can stalk Officer Octogenarian. Ha ha just kidding.

That reminds me. I told my grandma in a round about way that I wanted to stay in Australia because I met a guy and I don’t want it to be a what if situation. My grandparents accepted that answer out of all the other reasoning’s I gave them. Staying for a friends engagement party or just because I am happier here isn’t good enough. They must really want me to find an entire boyfriend, get married and contribute to the worlds overpopulation by having lots of babies. I seem to have this weird fixation with rejecting the other two ideas that come after boyfriend. I DON’T wanted to get married yet and DON’T want to have kids yet either.

I was also thinking about things recently regarding further travels to other countries. Another country I’d like to visit is Brazil, but I’d want to go as with an aid organisation that helps the people there, rather than see the actually tourist type stuff. I want to see what is actually happening behind all the glitz and glamour. So ladies and gentlemen in a few years time Brazil is my next adventure. This is Plan E.

Recently it was my birthday and I am now 23. Joan threw a dinner party masquerading as my birthday party, which was actually Joan’s dinner party. Joan even blew out half of my birthday candles on the cake. How strange is that? It was a fun party and it was awful nice of Joan to host such an occasion and the pictures taken were also quite amusing. Afterwards, Joan, Ana, Amy and I went out to the clubs. Joan and Ana left early, but Amy and I ended up staying till 4 a.m. It was awesome fun. I never saw Officer Octogenarian though…he is usually around the clubbing scene…hmmmm….maybe I should get a new crush.

P.S. Next year I’ll be 24

RIP Femputer Purpleton 2003

This is awesome!! Spiderman reminds me of my brother….it makes me homesick :)

Yesterday I woke up before 4 a.m. this morning. I couldn't get back to sleep. It was as if I was forced to think about going home or staying here. By 5 a.m. I gave up on trying to sleep and I decided to articulate my thoughts in the form of a pros and cons list. I hasn't seemed to help.

I have sad news my computer dear old femputer has died and gone to heaven. I tried to use the restoration CD to restore it to factory settings, as it was suggested to help stop it from shutting down randomly, but it froze so I restarted my computer now my computer does not work. Oh wells it had to go eventually. I am just thankful I had everything backed up before my entire computer went kaputz. You know how they say that writers have their favourite typewriters, well this computer was my typewriter.

So now I work on my entire assignments on different computers….lamenting the death of my old metallic brick of junk. Sadly my novel may be on permanent hiatus now…that is if I can afford a new computer. I like having my space to write for some reason. I always have this hidden fear that people in the class will be looking over my shoulder watching what I am writing for some reason.

My next step is too. Take out the ram and hard drive as those can be saved and take my entire computer and punt it off the end of Mount Archer. The damned thing better go out with a bang.

P.S. I have till Decemberish, possibly March to stay :)