New Species Discovered Now Missing
By Alice Sycorax
Bamboozle Chronicle Herald
A new species has been discovered just off the cost of Fergaria-Finbarton on Thursday Island by the universes top scientist, thinkers, writers and law enforcers.
This rare species which resembles a big brown furry dragon was discovered when it had kidnapped fellow Bamboozle Chronicle journalist and best selling novelist Sarah Evans, took her to her nest and forced her to say unspeakable names to enjoy the effects, much like alcohol and ice cream is enjoyed by humans and Neptunian’s alike.
However, it shied away from the names that causes headaches, chicken behaviour and the one associated with board games and favoured the unspeakable names that made you laugh and have a good nap. These names will not be said due to their devastating affects.
“It was quite an odd experience,” said Ms. Evans, who tells of her experience with the big brown furry dragon named Bertha.
This new species has been called Brown Fergarian Ridgeback and is known to scientists as Brown Fergus Finbrownstin Fergalarius.
“She was quite intrigued by unspeakable names, which I think are quite ridiculous. Nevertheless she had me say them over and over again. One of the names was of my good friend, but it causes headaches so she wasn’t too keen on it,” said Ms. Evans.
Luckily, Ms. Evans her friends Finbar, a big brown dog, and Mrs. Lachlan’s Mum a sociopathic suffering from dissociative personality disorder rescued her after texting her fiancé Officer Octogenarian 97 times.
“I honestly thought she was flattering me,” says Officer Octogenarian.
They have since broken up over the incident. His suffering from narcissism to blame.
In an odd twist Bertha was kidnapped by a Bamboozle Times journalist Amanda Beaverton in hopes to use Bertha as a heater for her trip to Alaska.
Top scientist at Fergaria Finbarton National University Professor Date Keakin was baffled by this turn of events and demands Ms. Beaverton return Bertha to her native habitat so the university can fully study her.
“So far we have determined that Fergarian Ridgebacks are hydro breathing not fire breathing and all she (Ms. Beaverton) could hope to use Bertha for is to make a nice cup of tea,” said Prof. Keakin.
P.S. Hmmmmmm......I have no idea!