I wonder is last entry crossed the line? In fact I think my statuses on Facebook sometimes are risqué. Maybe I am just more open book then I should be.
Hev- Lady drives me crazy. On Wednesday I had plans to make hangy-outy (another made up word. :P) with some friends from church at 7 p.m. But mom got groceries and assumed I was staying home all by myself while she was at choir, therefore I would be home when the groceries came at 7:30. I had no idea I had to share all my plans with my mom. Now at first I was really annoyed, by my friend Hat-Guy ran into me downtown and when I told him he offered to pick me up afterwards. Yay! And upon deeper reflection I realised I was going to be eating the groceries and Hev-Lady had bought some of them for my up coming trip (More on that later). So it was a win, win.
Anyways Hev-Lady has her moments, but her heart is usually in the right place and even though her passion is misdirected. Unfortunately her passion comes through in her temper and that is really the only issue I have.
Tomorrow I leave for Edmonton for 5 days! Woot! I am going to Breakforth. The thoughts of big crowds and concerts scare the crap out of me, but I was reading in a book somewhere the best way to defeat anxiety is to face what you fear and that way it doesn’t come back again. Supposedly… still doesn’t explain why I had a crippling fear of the dark before going to Australia and instantaneously the night I arrived my sudden fear of the dark is gone. This was a fear that was so irrational I remember fighting with my grandma to leave the light on in a motel room and when she didn’t I ended up covering my head with the sheet and cried myself to sleep. It has been erased from my list of bizarre phobias. Like black toilet seats in public washrooms… I digress, I don’t see how traveling overseas conquers a completely unrelated fear. So hopefully overcoming my apparent mild case of agoraphobia is the main reason, which even more oddly appeared when I got back from Australia. Then of course there is spiritual growth it is a Christian conference after all. People get a weird look when I tell them where I am going.
Me: Yay I am going to Edmonton for five days!
Random person I am inflicting my ramblings on: Oh wow what are going for a small vacation?
Me: Oh no just a conference with some friends
Random person: Oh what kind?
Me: Breakforth it’s a Christian conference. I am taking most of the classes with writing.
Random Person: Oh…
Me: I am also going to conquer my fear of crowds.
This is followed by a strange look and awkward silence. It seems there’s a label attached to ones faith.
I wonder why is there something taboo about going to Christian events? Is being a Christian something to be pertained as awkward? Do perhaps they think of me differently now as the truth of my spiritual (rather then religious) activities are revealed? I consider myself a Christian in a sense and I believe in God. So what? I am who I am and I believe what I believe, that’s the beauty of living in a country with many freedoms I know I sadly take for granted.
So due to my inadequacy to properly save. I am going with only $30 it should be fascinating. I went to Sydney with hardly any money my second trip and I managed to get by.
Life is dandy for now…THE END
P.S. How long do I have to fall down this skyscraper called life until I grow wings and fly away unscathed before I make a big splat on the cold hard reality of the pavement below?
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