Life and times of an astrophysist who is actually a former journalism student who is really a NERD nerdy retarded weird girl pretending to be an astrophysisist...mispelling INTENDED!

NERD nerdy retarded weird girl central...well mostly my mussings and random interludes whilst I am working towards getting a car and licence so my random adventures and time spent in Australia was worth while. It should be intersting Enjoy! While in Australia...I was sunburnt,went to Sydney and wrote my first novel. So far back in Canadia I have been couch hoping and meandering from city to city. More adventures to come. Hopefully they are as interesting as my Australia ones.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Fake Bookings + Catastrophe = Silly Melissa Giggles

Dear readers I know who read my blog....

What have I been up too since the 13 of January? Quite a bit actually, but for some reason I have neglected my blog for almost an entire month. I plan to write more even if it’s shorter and more pointless than this one. In fact I am updating now because I have been getting friendly reminders from certain people over the last two days.

Reminders that say:

“Update your entire blog!”



“When are you going to update your blog?”

So I am assuming that since there is a sufficient demand for an update I’d better write one. NOW, NOW, NOW!

Anyways I have some exciting news! Guess who made bookings at Pixi Foto recently?

NIGEL BOTTINGTON! At 9 am on Saturday the 23!


*Drum roll!*

40 minutes after Nigel. (Under the pseudo name of Cathy Somerfield…They’ve banned people with the name Such And Such and if I put Mrs. Lachlan’s Mum I think they’d find it rather obvious)

Daniel Hillard from Mrs. Doubtfire made a booking at 10:20 too!

Then 3 people are being rung up at a later day by them…

ASHLEIGH MCGLONAGICK!! She want’s pictures to send to Scotland (Again if I put Neptune…)

PHILIS PHILMORE (Has a request that close up shots are made because she is worried she won’t fit in the camera shots)

NORMA NORMINGTON! She are wants nice pictures too!!!

This prospect of booking my superheroes characters gives me entire silly Melissa giggles.

They will also be calling

Janet Weis and Brad Majors from Rocky Horror Picture Show

And Robin Hobb the famous author

As well as a clever play on words…

PAT SMEARS! (Think Pap Smear) Because they love to talk about them so much! In fact one time I heard them talking about their ovaries while a lady in a pram meandered by.

And just for Chris Laura Honeysome…

Along with other random people who don’t exist. Who knew that fake people were more keen to book than real ones. Case in point I intend to leave my dastardly job with an entire bang.

I’ve had a tyrannical obsession with sticking it to Pixi Foto for the last two days now. I feel kind of bad, but then again Mrs. Amazing James Dean Lady is only giving me three hours next week so to that I say...see you later! They are proud of my sudden amazing rise in my rates, that will be until they call the adult shop, Later Day Saints (Mormons), Jehovah’s Witnesses, another REAL photo studio, escorts, septic tank treatments, pregnancy termination services, Jenny Craig and others I can’t remember.

I am going to be in so much trouble. However, I must give 50 -70 % credit to my flatmate Elise who told me I should do it!

This all started when I had my first talking to by my manager at Pixi Foto by Miss Amazing James Dean Lady. Apparently when she wanted me to get some dastardly unrealistic amount of bookings in a half hour I rolled my eyes. But not only did I roll my entire eyes I did so in the presence of a potential recruit into her anti nerd nerdy retarded army of photographers. I say anti because they are on a different level than me. Don’t get me wrong I like Miss Amazing James Dean Lady and her sidekicks Fig-Lady and Jam-Woman, but they have amazingly high expectations and demands on my promoting ability. Apparently I should be bringing in more for the $18 an hour they pay me and if I don’t get my rate up there is no point in keeping me around. It’s not my fault if they have gotten them done before, have their own cameras, don’t have the money to pay or have many other legitimate excuses. Case in point I am looking for another job…AN ENTIRE NEW JOB! So now it’s evident I will leave this job with catastrophic outcomes for both parties.

Not to mention they make me feel like an outcast because I feel more smart then them. For instance Fig-Lady assumed where I live will be affected by the flood coming to Rocky. I felt like saying I live on higher ground you twat! Yes the water is going to roll up the hill…But I didn’t because it wouldn’t have been nice.

This is also the first time in my life I rejected someone. I’ve never been in this situation before. I am usually the rejected not the rejecter! I won’t go into much details nor, will I mention who it is because my friends know the entire story and that’s pretty much all the counts. I feel pretty horrible about potentially breaking someone’s heart, but I was told this is normal. It’s not my fault if I am not attracted to him in that way. I think if I did like him I would want him in that way, which I don’t. I think there has to be passion, butterflies, can’t eat, can’t sleep, dwelling in my dreams like some sort of reoccurring character. Even if they happen to say NO NEVER! To you while in dream land. Apparently, love of this kind is dangerous and unhealthy according to someone. Sadly I don’t see this person’s point! I’ll like who I like even if it’s unrequited because one day you never know if someone special will come along. Hev-Lady always said that these kinds of feelings are natural. It’s what makes us loving and caring beings. I agree. I just hope I made the right decision.

P.S. I have more I could write, but I’ll save that for another entry! Sorry I've been gone so long

1 comment:

Laura Urine-Song Honeyboobies said...

Dear Melissa,

Thank you for finally updating your entire blog. You are indeed going to go out with a dastardly bang at Pixi Foto.

My message though wasn't update update, it was DATE UP DATE UP DATE UP DATE UP NOW NOW NOW NOW!!!