Life and times of an astrophysist who is actually a former journalism student who is really a NERD nerdy retarded weird girl pretending to be an astrophysisist...mispelling INTENDED!

NERD nerdy retarded weird girl central...well mostly my mussings and random interludes whilst I am working towards getting a car and licence so my random adventures and time spent in Australia was worth while. It should be intersting Enjoy! While in Australia...I was sunburnt,went to Sydney and wrote my first novel. So far back in Canadia I have been couch hoping and meandering from city to city. More adventures to come. Hopefully they are as interesting as my Australia ones.

Saturday, February 09, 2008

Thank's Tickle Face!

Dear hopefully respondent readers,

Here is my attempt at being more attentive to my blog. I will start off by making an entire correction. In my previous entry, I stated I got a message regarding my blog which said

“UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE NOW NOW NOW!”

But really is said.

DATE UP DATE UP DATE UP NOW NOW NOW!

Sorry for misleading any dear readers and causing harm to the message sender himself.

It’s hard to believe in nine days I’ll have been in Australia for two years which is two entire babies and then some, but according to Chris,

“When a woman has a baby she gets pregnant for seven months to dog face lady man.”

So if this theory were correct it would be three babies and a bit?

Anyways, I would have written a longer entry last time but lately the computer lab is constantly taken over by entire Brazilians. ENTIRE BRAZILIANS! By about 7 p.m. they smarm in to look at pornography. At around 8:00 Friday night six of them filled the room instantaneously. By 8:15 there were at least eight. I had to make a quick escape before they attempted hitting on me and asking me repeatedly if I am married or speak Portuguese. As I left the room I being polite said see you later bye! To which all six of them in unison said bye! Then one, who is 36 and likes 23 said “I love you!” and smiled at me. I was seriously freaked out and made a hasty exit. Mr. Thirty Six is the creepiest he keeps telling me that I am very beautiful and that he dreams about me, but enough about Brazilians.

I guess I could start with writing about a dream I had that was very confounding or interesting to say the least.

I dreamt a cold snap came to Australia, just like the kind back home in Canada. It was snowy, cold, freezing, but I didn’t feel a thing. I felt quite normal. I was walking down the street enjoying it for some reason. I remember all my friends complaining and I kept saying, “You think this is cold? It’s much worse back home!” The only thing I remember from the cold that was out of place was my feet were really cold because of my boots.

I remember some friends saw me and they offered me a lift. Officer Old was in the car but I didn’t see who was driving as he was sitting in the passenger’s seat. He seemed really happy, but just like real life I couldn’t seem to speak to him. The car was like the cars back home, which is the opposite of Australia. I quickly got in the back seat stopping two other girls from trying to get in because I thought they were evil. I wasn’t successful as one of the girls made it in magically. Suddenly on the way the girl who made it in kept whining how she needed to go to Big W so she could buy underwear and I said I might as well go because I need to check the roster. I think it was my way of keeping the peace.

I then remember walking down a set dodgy stairs to check the rosters. But the railings kept breaking when I held on to it for support and I was for some reason walking around in my bare feet and I kept thinking I really need shoes. I then checked the roster diligently searching for my name, but I couldn’t find it. Feeling distressed I asked a manager what the go was, to which he replied they had to make some cut backs and they’d call me if they needed me. I felt that I was in actual fact fired and felt really anxious and I wanted to cry. I suddenly thought now I am screwed because I’ve lost both my jobs, first Pixi Foto and now Big W. Funnily I felt as though I cause Pixi Foto to be angry with me.

So I not willing to give up went straight to the head manager (who is a very scary lady boss I might add) bare feet and all decided to tell her the situation. I pleaded with her to give me another chance. I said:

“Please can I have my job back because my I am uni and my grandma said she won’t help me if I don’t have a job and I’ll have to go home.”


I was on the brink of tears. The assistant manager who was in the office too, (he is pretty scary too) and he told the head lady boss not to listen to me, but luckily she sighed reluctantly and said “OK.” I felt an overwhelming peace and I replied, very enthusiastically.

“Thanks Tickle Face!”

I suddenly realised I shouldn’t have said that because the manger looked very silent and shocked because I was in fact pointing out a giant fuzzy ticklish looking spider on her shoulder, named Tickle Face who was the real manager of Big W and was helping me all along. I wasn’t supposed to bring attention to this. I suddenly felt panicked and that is where this dream ends.

It’s after that bizarre ending to my dream I thought what the hell? In retrospect I figured out some of the meanings. I am homesick, my grandma who is helping me is Tickle Face as I am not supposed to tell anyone she is helping and reflects some real life fears, mainly the one about getting fired, which is strange because I am willingly going to be fired from Pixi Foto. In fact I keep lying to them and scarily it’s getting easier. It makes me feel unsettled. I am being completely dishonest and yet surprised that I am getting away with it at the same time

I also know how to get ones attention. On Wednesday I saved Jo’s belongings from peril in the laundry room. I wondering when she will come and collect it ask her when are you coming to get your stuff? To which there was no reply. So I resulting to drastic scare tactics text her this.

“My flatmate wants to have a bonfire and your stuff is it. She said she’s sick of looking at your bra!”

To which I was rung at 10 a.m. by a frantic Jo asking.

“What the hell is happening too my stuff!?”


I told her it was merely a joke and a device to get her attention, which let’s face it worked. She said it wasn’t very nice as she a couple of things are family treasures from 50 years ago. I know it wasn’t very nice. Joan, Joan, Joan like I’d let anything happen to your stuff!

This entry was random as my flatmate and I discussing what we should sacrifice to the naked lady statue outside. I’ve given her flowers twice, both symbols of guilt, (if you read last entry you’ll figure it out), an Australian flag, a bird feather and a necklace. Elise says the guy who mows our lawn will be seriously confused. We also discussed giving it bread and chanting to it when our new flatmate arrives to freak her out. Also something as mandatory and equally as random as updating my blog, Song of the Superheroes is now in it’s final stages of completion. I’m now done the third draft and will upload it for your reading pleasure. I think and hope this is the final one.

P.S. NEON MEATE DREAM OF OCTOFISH!

2 comments:

Myhumangetsmeblues said...

Mel-Dog,

That are an intriguing dream that you have had of Monsieur Tickle Face. Perchance is he up for an appearance in "Fizzy Lemonade"? He are could be Officer Old's boss, who sits on the police chief's shoulder or something like that.

Just one thing: It is not "Neon Meate Dream of Octofish", it is "Neon Meate Dream of *A* Octofish". I mean "A", not "AN" by the way. I am letting you know this in case angry Captain Beefheart fans come searching for you.

Maybe you should are sacrifice Dave to the statue.

Princess Jo said...

OOOO...sounds like your leading an interesting life!

I have an entire puppy!

Jo