Life and times of an astrophysist who is actually a former journalism student who is really a NERD nerdy retarded weird girl pretending to be an astrophysisist...mispelling INTENDED!


NERD nerdy retarded weird girl central...well mostly my mussings and random interludes whilst I am working towards getting a car and licence so my random adventures and time spent in Australia was worth while. It should be intersting Enjoy! While in Australia...I was sunburnt,went to Sydney and wrote my first novel. So far back in Canadia I have been couch hoping and meandering from city to city. More adventures to come. Hopefully they are as interesting as my Australia ones.

Monday, June 26, 2006

You're so Chris and Amy.. I bet you think this post is about you

Our Adventure as We See It

Conversations between Carol and I…. discussing her visit in February and what would happen if I were still in Canada. This is a guestimation of what was said. I miss my friend.

Carol: With all the time differences. When I come to your house I might just fall asleep on the floor until you start poking me with a stick.
Me: Wake up!
Carol: Carol you awake? Kick kick, nudge nudge, poke poke.
Me: Smack, smack.
Carol: Continues poking…
Me: Carol are you awake?
Carol: Owwwww Melissa!
Carol: I’m tired give me a piggy back ride. But you say the hell with that, walk yourself, damned you!
Me: I’ll make you a make shift stretcher.
Carol: What’s a make shift stretcher? (This is not to make Carol sound dumb….she actually did ask this. I thought it was funny.)
Me: Its something used to carry people on. I’ll hook it to the back of my bike and carry you around.
Carol: Cool
Me: Yes yes it is.
Carol: Faster Melissa Faster.
Me: No I can’t its too much work.
Carol: Faster *cracks whip!*
Me: Ow ow stop Carol… this is harder than it looks
Carol: FASTER! Cracks whip again.
Me: Oh no the whip Owe it hurts stop it Carol. Ahahahaahahahahahah!
Carol: Ahahaahahahahahah FASTER!
Me: Better yet… I will find you a kangaroo.
Me: I will be like here Carol, hop a roo.
Carol: Or maybe you will get me a wallaby and I will name it Wally. Carol has a thing for wallabies.

Its 3p.m. my time and 11p.m. Carol’s time, I am bored as I can think of nothing else to say or do. When I remember…

Me: if it were 3 p.m. and I was back home I would ask you to do something.
Me: pretending I am back home…Carol lets do something! *shakes fist angrily*
Carol: Yeah I know I am bored.
Me: Me too.
Carol: I miss you Melissa *cries wipes tear from eye*
Me: Awhhhh Carol you want a Kleenex? *hands one to friend.*
Carol: Thank you… *blows nose in most disgusting way in order to gross out friend.*
Me: Ewww…. *Suggests friend go to doctor to clear out nasal passages.*
Carol: Carol is to poor to see a doctor.
Me: Fine I demand doctor sees friend for free.

I added more pictures to my walls in my room… I have a Great Keppel wall, an Australia wall, a Canada wall and a wall of contradiction. Yesterday: Sadly I didn’t tested my bike out yet or mail off postcards meant to go my Mom and Grandma in Eastern Canada.

Today I rode my bike it works so much better now. I was able to go up hills no problem. I wonder if it’s psychological or I actually could make it up those hills better. Anyways I finally mailed the post cards to my rellies (relatives.) The post offices are weird here. In Canada, when you come to mail stuff at post office they will put it in the bin for you behind the counter here in Australia they make you post it yourself.

The tale of the three Grandma’s

Ah yes my Grandma in Eastern Canada… I call her my British Nanny. I don’t think she knows that either. She is my blood related Grandma. I have three Grandmas a step Grandma, who I call my gram…but not to her face. Never call my gram granny. She says it makes her feel old. She gets very angry. And finally my adopted Grandma, who I call grandma, but I feel awkward in doing so, I think it’s because she is my brothers Grandma and I am only related by marriage. She looks like an actual stereotypical grandma. She has white hair, wears and apron and cooks really good food. Both my adopted grandma and step grandma live in Western Canada. Now thanks to me you can stalk all three of them.

You're so Chris I bet you think this post is about you

I finally finished my Wild Will story about Chris… It’s really weird. It is littered with more inside jokes. Its also slightly more vulgar, because I know Chris would get it more. I haven’t typed it up yet thought. If not I will post it in my story blog. I have this thing where I have to write it on paper first then type it up. I figured since I wrote a story for Amy I should write one for Chris. Perhaps I will even write one about Antonia. It won’t be a Wild Will story, maybe about her coming to Australia from Hong Kong and how she meets her new friends… an eccentric Australian, a down to earth Australian and a shy, yet outgoing Canadian. Hmmm… that’s a good idea. The reason for a non Wild Will story: I am not sure she would appreciate the humour. Ah yes and Carol too… she doesn’t understand Wild Will either… so I guess I will think of something else.

I remember when I asked Chris what I should name Amy’s Wild Will Story…We were at McDonalds on our last day with Antonia…it was a sad day, but a good day all at the same time. It suddenly occurred to me how I wrote my brother stories for Christmas. So I thought I should write Amy one since she was going away. Meanwhile we are signing Amy’s going away card with out Amy’s knowledge. Although Amy is smart enough to know that something was up.

Me: Should I write a Wild Will Story for Amy?
Chris: Sure sure (imitating Antonia, in case you are wondering Antonia has a way of saying sure that is unique.)

Sometime after… I started my story. I was attempting to come up with an idea of the story. Which at this point was about Amy, who wants to be a Bollywood Star but needs an Bollywood name. I got to the part where I was giving Amy a new name. I couldn’t remember the Indian name Amy liked… The rest of the story is as follows… she calls Wild Will, a rottweiler, who with the help of John a rather giant man and a koala named Adventure Joe, help her come up with one. Meanwhile Chris has gone kind of crazy because he hasn’t had his daily dose of caffeine. I do nothing in this story of real importance.

I yet again called on Chris.

Me: Hey do you remember the Indian name she gave her self I am writing her a story?
Chris: I think its Aishwarya…
Me: That’s what I thought.
Me: Wow that was a normal answer… I thought it would be something weird.

Little did I know what he would say next…

Later on…

I needed as name for my story, something to call it. So I yet again asked Chris… his suggestions were partially helpful or somewhat odd actually.

Me: Chris my story for Amy is finished. I just need a title. Any ideas?
Chris: Vagina and the Amy if not how about You’re so Amy?
Me thinking: Ah I don’t think that first title will work. I think Amy would be shocked if I called it that.
Me: Hmm I guess…it’s about Amy, she is in search of Bollywood name, a man named Raul and I said she was a lesbian fire fighter.
Chris: Cool

It has a rather long name but, it works to an extent I think. I ended up calling the story: In search of the perfect Bollywood name: You’re so Amy I bet you think this story is about you! So all though his answer is a little on the weird side, it helped in the long run. Amy ended up being very touched by the story or merely maybe it was the gesture of writing her a story. Amy told me that Wild Will is her cult figure. Ah I am so proud.

1 comment:

Lidia said...

Hey Melissa!
Yes, i love my story, and i can't wait to read Chris' one!! I reackon it would be so hilarious! Carol sounds cool , i hope i get to meet her!
Luv Amy