When do you throw out that bar of soap?

Rove McManus and my search for understanding of Aussie humour...

I want to go to Melbourne, because I want to meet Rove McManus and ask him to explain to me why he is funny and what he has against Kiwis (People from New Zealand) I mean sometimes he is funny, but other times I don’t get it. Maybe it’s the Aussie humour?

But now it seems that it was already explained to me by my friend Amy. Aussies make fun of Kiwis because New Zealand is like their little sister and they tease them. I also noticed a rivalry when it comes to sports, mainly rugby… But I’ll explain that some other day.

In case you’re wondering I am talking about a weekly late night talk show called Rove Live, which kind of resembles the daily late night shows of Jay Leno and David Letterman style, but not really. He does the monologue, talks to his buddy Pete, which is simular to Conan O’Brian Late Night and he does a segment called “What The” which is kind of like Headlines from Jay Leno’s the Tonight show on Monday nights.

Last week weeks show he went on and on about how June, 6 2006 was 666 and how unlucky it is, how people from New Zealand have lisps, not to mention attempting to get Jennifer Aniston’s baseball cap back. I also wonder do guests on the show eat the M&Ms he has on set. Are they even real? Oh wells at least he isn’t on about Merkins still. Frick he went on about that for three or four weeks. Merkins are like toupees for the nether regions. I don’t see how that is funny.

Last night he made out with an ash tray, which he called a “pash tray,” made for those who miss their lovers “dirty kisses.” It was disgusting. He had ashes in his mouth. Pash is an Aussie term for French kissing, an open mouth kiss, a long and passionate kiss, you get it. He also made fun of Germany, reinforcing stereotypes, while managing to dress like a woman. According to Rove and Pete, Germans only eat sausages. He then had a staged sumo fight with the host from Wheel of Fortune, the Australian version, not the American one. Yes there are two different versions. It’s the same exact thing except the money sections on the wheel have less money on them. It only goes up to $500 and they don’t ask to buy vowel they just ask for it and are automatically charged for it. Sorry… about that distracting side note. Anyways he also put money into his Harrison Ford Swear Jar, because he said asses in front of 12-year-old soccer player.

On a good note he mentioned Canada last night. Canadian Idol was featured as part of the week’s “awkward TV moment” someone auditioning for the show broke wind. Poor Canadian girl if only she knew that this was seen in Australia and a loud eccentric Aussie TV host plus mates, made fun of her.

I wonder what good old Rove will do next Tuesday? Will he fire himself out a cannon get hyper off of stale m&ms, make fun of the Queen again?

You know what would be great? To get my mom to tape Royal Canadian Air Farce, mail it to Rove and say… this stuff is funny where I am from, watch and learn some Canadian humour. Not that Aussie humour is bad. I sometimes feel like writing to his help desk and asking him a stupid question. Like an anonymous person last night did. “When do you know to throw out a bar of soap?” I don’t know. When? Roves answer: “When it becomes smaller than the pubic hair you are washing it with or when you get paper cuts.” Ewww....